Monday, April 11, 2011

Speaking of Product Descriptions...

This is the trial blurb that I have on my website, what do you think?




One thousand years in the future, an extraordinary woman will have to make a choice between losing her humanity or her life. Lythian Kennett is a vampire trapped in a world she despises. A fatal misstep draws her out of the shadows and into the fight of her life. Persued by a relentless adversary, one mistake could cost her not only her own life, but those of her companions as well. 

She never asked to be their leader. 

She never asked to be their savior. 


But then again, she never asked to be a vampire... 









6 comments:

Jimmie Hammel said...

Thanks, I worry that vampires are way over done right now, but I don't think I can write anything else until this novel is out of my head.

It's possible that the lack of a dominant romantic story line will turn off fantasy readers, and the vampire angle will turn off sci-fi readers. Mixing genres is always a gamble (read: usually a mistake).

My favorite stories have always been futuristic space dramas, and dark, vampire tales. I'm not sure how mixing them will turn out at the end, but I'm hopeful.

Donald Wells said...

You're right about mixing genres being a gamble, but hey, we write what we write. I remember reading somewhere that Stephen King was asked once why he wrote horror. His answer--"What makes you think I have a choice?"
I've published six novels so far and every one of them is a mix of genres. (Some romance, some crime, a little suspense.) I just try to tell the story in my head the best way I know how to do it. If you write well, your readers will find you, in fact, they're probably dying to meet you.

Nicholas La Salla said...

Well said, Donald.

Jimmie, I think you definitely have the start of a really good product description. One thing to keep in mind with Amazon and e-book sellers in general is that there is no need to keep the description short at all.

That's the only thing I can recommend to improve yours: more info. As it is, we know that SOMETHING is going to happen, but we don't know what. Who's threatening her humanity or (un)life? Why? What is she going to do about it? What choice?

I think the best move is to make your description as exact and specific as you possibly can. Obviously you don't want to unveil a synopsis of the whole book, but you want to give out a little hook that will bait potential customers into becoming real ones.

Hope this helps!

Best,

Nick
One More Day: A Modern Ghost Story

Jimmie Hammel said...

Whenever I talk about mixing genres, I always say, "you can have magic, or you can have spaceships but you can't have both. The only time it ever worked was for Star Wars." Recently, I've been rethinking that assessment. Is there really no market for cross-genre fiction, or is it that publishers aren't willing to print it because they wouldn't know what shelf to stick it on?

Jimmie Hammel said...

Thanks Nick, I will definitely flesh it out a bit for Amazon. It's hard to be sure how much to give away. I've always hated books that ruined a surprise by putting it on the back cover. At the same time you want to let your readers know what to expect.

L. David Hesler said...

I'm no expert (after all, I am the Noob), but this sounds great so far. I like Nick's advice about fleshing it out a little bit; on the other hand, this is the hardest part of enticing an audience. It's "the sell" and it's baffled me for some time.

Maybe in your description, you could provide hints about the setting or society? You've teased us here in the comments with alluding to magic and spaceships existing together; and we know your book takes place a thousand years in the future. So, what would your description look like if you told us about just one thing she despises about that futuristic society? Just one morsel of a detail could turn a description on its head.

Really not trying to be a jerk, so hopefully that paragraph doesn't read like I am! Good luck with this book. Indie authors unite!